supporting
single moms

Hi everyone!

My name is Depree and I am mother to two young sons..Israel (just turned 3) and Emmanuel 22 months. I am leaving my husband. Early this year in January, he was caught trying to choke our 3 year old son. There is a restraining order against him so he cannot see Israel for 2 years. Prior to this things were getting pretty abusive--grabbing me, yelling and screaming and us and the children. My 3 year old son was even displaying some of the behaviors that daddy was showing. He has been out of our home since January and honestly--I have never felt safer... I am safe. My kids are safe and I don't want to go back ot that place at all. I have some support from people at my church and my friends and family have been an awesome support system. The Bishop of my church says that my husand and I can get through this... and that I shouldn't worry about the children getting taken away from CPS ( this will happen if anything happens again, if I were to stay with him--the social worker and I discussed this). My Bishop also told me that I will be lonely and it will be financiallly hard. I was lonely and scared in my marriage. I can't stay in this relationship. I won't. I have confidence in myself that I can make it. Before I didn't. I just need support. Thanks everyone...

D in WA

HI Depree,

I'm sorry to hear that you have had to deal with this.  You are absolutely doing the right thing by making sure you are safe and your kids are safe.  I know you will get different people with different opinions about what you should do, but you are the only one that knows what is best for you and your kids.  No argument that it will be hard, but it will be rewarding too. Hang in there and feel free to write anytime.  You can do this!

airamstar

HI DEPREE! I THINK YOU DID A GREAT THING WHEN YOU LEFT THAT ABUSIVE MAN AND SMARTER TO GET A (RESTRAINING ORDER) ESPECIALLY AFTER I READ HE HAD CHOKED YOUR SON. I MYSELF HAD GOTTEN OUT OF A ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP FINALLY AFTER 11/2 YEARS, AND SEEN MY SHARE OF ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITH FRIENDS AND SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE I CAN SAY YES YOUR SON WILL START ACTING THE SAME ONLY TO GET WORSE IN THE LONG RUN. YOU NEED TO GET HIM INTO SOME COUNCILING AND CONTINUE TO SHOW HIM WHO RUNS THE HOUSE IS (YOU) IN A RESPECTFULL, RESPONSIBLE, STABLE PLACE NOW AND THERE NEEDS TO BE BOUNDRIES AND LIMITS. STAY STRONG IN FRONT OF YOUR CHILDREN AND FIRM PLUS CLEAR WHEN YOU COMMUNICATE ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU SPEAK TO THEM. ALSO KEEP UP WITH THAT RESTRAINING ORDER MAKE SURE TO BE ON TOP OF ALL THE COURT DATES AND EVERYTHING OR SOMETHING CAN GO WRONG. GOOD LUCK

Hey there. I am proud to hear your strength in your story. I have also been thru abusive crzy stuff and hate it all. It is awesome when I women prevails thru the "other"side! I have stayed at YWCA Women's Shelter to get out of abuse. TAke care of yourself and your emotions and your head !st--when you lose that , it will all go quickly. Support, vent, bit** , get it out girl. I feel for you. Thanks for sharing.

is that really the truth? or are you being a woman and just trying to gety back at him!