She walked into the emergency room with her mouth half open. Her sister by her side. Loyal as always. 10 minutes went by along with deep red rose blood on her hands that dripped down her arm. She walked into the triage. The nurse knew. The nurse asked “How did this happen?”
She said “It was an accident.”
The nurse said “Okay. How did this happen?”
She said “It happened in an accidental way.”
The nurse’s eye’s danced in to her mouth. “Fine. It’s your life. Not mine.”
30 minutes went by in the emergency room. A cop walked by. Her heart started to run. Her father sat next to her with his back to her. Her sister in front of her wondering how a hero could fall. The beast walked in. He said he was sorry. He really meant to say that he couldn’t go back to a cell.
So she had an anxiety attack because she couldn’t close her mouth. A simple physical face movement was stripped away by an elbow. It dangled midway on to her tongue.
Her body was a rock. The doctor gave her a look. A look of pity. The beast held her hand. He played his role . The role of an animal. She laid there looking up at the cold white blank ceiling. She looked ahead down to her toes t o see snoopy and SpongeBob crawling on nurses’ uniforms. There was a nurse on each end of her foot. Ready to grab them down as her toes were getting ready to curl into her. She looked over to him wondering how…. His hands held her hands down. He always held her down. His hands were ice cold –hers were warm. It was his only way of embracing warmth. She told the doctor that this could not be done without pain killers. She walked through out the world feeling numb; she needed to feel this way-now. She desperately wanted to feel numb. The doctor said it could not be done that it would die.
But I’m already dead.
Thoughts of beauty ran through her head. She could not lose a tooth. She would stay in her house never to leave. Her smile would die. She would look through all her beautiful pictures wishing that she could f eel that essence…beauty she thought she had felt. She had never felt the true basis of her beauty for she was told day in and day out. If not admired she would believe that it didn’t exist until someone praised her again of beauty she thought she had known.
The beast that held her hand was there to prove his innocence. Didn’t you know it was afreak accident. Didn’t I tell you already! You idiot! This is all your fault! He elbowed her to dig into her stomach not her face.
If he held her down tighter she would be tamed. He would finally tame her. A black stallion running through Garden City raping knowledge through education. Insecure men tame shrews.
Her free will was his. He knocked it out of her. He saw the blood in her hands.Pouring on to her hands while her legs lay out in front of her on the hardwood floor. She kept looking in the mirror to see how ugly she really was. Her dream had come true. The dream where we loose our pearls from our mouths only to find them in our hands in front of the ones we think we love.
It was time.
She said “No, doc. You must give me something. I can’t.”
Doc said “ It will die. We must push it back into it’s position. The root needs to be connected to heal.”
He said “I’m not sorry.”
She looked up at the ceiling with a cold stare with a cold hand with a warm heart asking for God to take her.
The tooth dangling on to dear life. The ER was busy that night with frantic doctors along the side of ailing patients praying to God for salud. She prayed that she had the strength to walk away. She grabbed the doctor’s frail forearm. The nurse held down her feet. He held her hand.
She dug her nails into the doctor’s frail forearm. She kicked the nurses who held down her feet. She held his hand.
Her scream was deafening. The ER’s frantic doctors stopped worrying along with the patient’s that prayed for her. Her scream gave a moment of clarity. I’m glad I’m not her. Her body lifted up off the cold white hospital bed. They held her down. She pushed up, they all pushed down, the doctor pushed her thumb forward. Guiding the tooth back to the root. Crooked. Tears raced along the blood that poured down her soft lips.
She looked over into his deep red eyes. He said “I love you.”
She thought nothing. Numb again. Couldn’t leave. The pain had left.